SICK TODAY

UP at 2 AM with vomiting and explosive diarrhea...it hit me like a freight train! It went on that way every two hours on the hour. Running desperately to the shower in the middle of the night with all of this happening all at once is the most out of control, helpless feeling. Not to mention being awakened from a dead sleep by sharp pains right in the middle of my stomach which made me heave and double over. I had defecation streaming down my legs as I held back the vomit with sheer will. I quickly staggered from my bed just in time to make it to the shower before we needed our carpet cleaned in a BIG way.

Luckily, Patrick had an easy day so he took care of Declan's morning routine for me. What a Prince! He took off work, and is still here at 2:43 in the afternoon. How kind and thoughtful he has been, looking after he and I, making rice and bringing me ice chips.

I find it very difficult to be sick, and I rarely am. Patrick told me it was the first time he has seen me sick, apart from morning sickness which doesn't count. This is God's way of saying you must take a break. You are taken care of. You can slow down and rest. I haven't vomited since 10 :00 this morning, so I think the worst is over. Whatever was in my body that didn't belong got violently evicted! I am eating the BRAT diet...you know, bananas rice applesauce toast, so that seems to be helping.

I am very lucky to have someone who loves me unconditionally, in sickness and in health in the truest sense of the words. I have had glimpses of it from time to time in relationships, but it was never my soul mate...my twin ray. I was looking for a best friend that I could trust like family, and I wasn't going to settle for less, even if that meant roaming this earth alone until my death, with nothing but Yogananda and a good dog and cat for sweet companionship. I have my deep scars from my parent's divorce when I was 15 that had kept most men at bay for so long. I am proud to call Patrick my best friend, and he is the first man that I have ever had a relationship that was the "best friend/brother turns into lover" thing with, and was a good friend and roomate for at least a year before we fell in love.

Declan likes a group hug every day, and if Patrick and I are hugging, he will squish himself in the middle. It is soo cute! Well, the other day he made up his first song "Best friend Daddy best friend Daddy Best friend Daddy...best friends!" Yesterday during our group hug he said " Mommy Daddy best friends!" From a kid's perspective, who could ask for anything more? I will be 41 this October 24th, and I couldn't be happier. I have blessings that are so out of control, that if you went up to me in 2005 and told me this was going to happen I would have laughed in your face. Big tough girl loner! Nyeeeeah!!